“Get off the computer and show me attention” is what I dealt with on a weekly basis. I had to choose between hustling and my relationship. So now I wake up earlier than my alarm to get uninterrupted time to business. I texted a friend at 430 A.M this morning and he texted back. The committed ones are up and at em. But wait…….
Many of us go through this: finding a balance between our relationships and building a business and today you will have the opportunity to learn the best and only way to handle this.
This article is for #entrepreneurs and / or #hustlers …that are trying to build something to last for multiple lifetimes. It’s beyond passion..it’s fucking insane. When one gets totally insane and nuts about creating they tend to forget about the finer things in life: like taking showers, going to the movies, going to a friend’s baby shower, going to weddings and damn… going to bed.
For the last 3 years, I can only remember a week or maybe two weeks total, 14 days, that I absolutely did NOTHING with my business. I was at a friends house recently and her and her husband guilted me into not being present at their wedding, or baby shower, or house warming. I was like damn, when was it? I totally forgot.
But, truthfully – it’s fucked up. It’s not a good habit to have that you can’t lift your head up one measly second to be with people that you care about. What is this world coming to.
You’re probably saying to yourself: “Yes, that’s me …I’m obsessed! I’m insane, and I am committed to the hustle! I don’t have any friends and the ones I did have I lost a long time ago!” You might be saying that.. to feel cool among other committed entrepreneurs. But guess what – “it’s totally stupid”
According to recent Inc. article, Warren Buffet, the old-man billionaire, stated that the greatest measure of success in life comes down to “how many of the people you want to have love you actually do love you.”
He goes on to talk about money not being able to buy love. It can buy sex. It can by testimonial dinners. But it cannot buy love. I agree. Do you?
The truth of the matter is this: While we are hard hitting it building businesses, especially those who are not 21-29 any more. Those of us who started a little later and got really committed need to do a daily test by asking: “Can this wait?”
Don’t think for a second that any of these internet friends you are marketing to on a daily basis on all these platforms are going to come to your funeral. So the next time you have some family event, and your girlfriend or boyfriend is bugging you, your brother has a get together, your father is in the hospital, your girlfriend wants to eat yogurt and watch netflix, your niece has a play, ….. ask yourself: “Can this wait?”
So how do you handle both? How can you be committed to both? Well, think of it like this. Even though people complain about having a 9 to 5 (the best hours of the day for productivity) as entrepreneurs, we still need to have a schedule- just like you are working a job. I love when I see these ‘lifestyle entrepreneurs’ with their laptop by the crystal blue ocean water showing you how easy it is to ‘make passive income’ while your over there on your kitchen table with dim lights trying not to wake the kids before 6AM, ask yourself: “Is that shit real?”
- Make a schedule. Work from sometime to sometime then put a hard stop on it. Even though you have to finish that one thing ask yourself “Can this wait?” not only that, make sure that you are better at being productive throughout that time: try this technique. Maybe if you stop worrying about the gram or the book you would get more done.
- Why. Why are you doing this anyway. Why are you building your business, crafting your craft and creating these products and services? Why are you blogging? There needs to be something tangible. Is it family? Is it for more time freedom, money freedom? Do you actually want to go on a vacation? No one naturally just wants to not make any money in the beginning of something to keep going on …for what? Why are you doing this. Write down your why! This will help you find it.
- Plan ahead and choose days off! Yep, just like working that boring 9 to 5. We do the same thing. We need days off. For everyone that says #nodaysoff – they are lying. I’m not going to lie. I took 14 days off in 3 years. and guess what… I was a fool. Don’t be a workhorse for social media. People want to show off but they aint got Warren Buffet money yet. Go take a nap!
- Which brings me to your health. Sleeping, exercising and relaxation. Some of my best ideas came from my taking time to relax and breath easy. You might want to take a listen to my Chronotypes of Sleep podcast to help you identify with your sleep DNA. Again, do not be fooled by the principles of people who have shown you exactly what they want to show you. It’s like T.V and cinema… it’ll be boring and people won’t watch if they showed you the naps, the tired times, the play times, the relaxation times, the book reading times, the taking a shit and piss times. So guess what. They load up exactly what they want you to believe about them.
All in all …could you choose between your work and love? I sacrificed my life to develop this company and watch it grow but I will never sacrifice my attention, love and relationships with others.
I wish I could be at Steve Jobs side during his last few months alive and see what was the most important things to him. Yet, we have it right now … we can do something about it. Be a better leader, ceo, entrepreneur and person by developing a well rounded schedule to include time with others. They matter.
If you don’t understand that …understand this: you do what is right for you. At the end of the day ..I know what makes me feel good and that’s to maximize my time here on earth in life and business. BOTH. Even though I am not perfect, I am trying to be a better human daily.
Do what works for you and do what makes you feel good.
Need help mastering yourself? My 30 day treatment will help you identify your priorities, help you with productivity and will allow you to master: mindset, mindfulness and self-motivation. Are you ready to take your life to the next level and really get your shit in order? Check out my 30 Day Success Program below:
Stacy A. Cross – Chief “Can this wait?” Officer
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