Following The Crowd Is A Waste

7 mins read

That’s Not A Typo .. It stands for Time, Energy, Resources and Money

When I was much younger, running around wild with the boys from my neighborhood, I always felt I had to measure up to them. There were times when I would be chosen last to play a round of baseball because they automatically thought I was weaker or less athletic. Then something crazy happened.


I was good. I was good at multiple sports and games: Baseball, Basketball, Tag, Manhunt …you name it, I dominated in it. They tried to understand who this tomboy of a girl was but I never stayed long enough to follow their lead.

The reality is that the business world is the same game. As a woman, you may feel you are not as smart as your male counterpart or you have to work twice as hard. The truth is in today’s world there are powerful women all across the board, in every field of study and business. But, everyone rolls back the curtain on the trend of now.

Where Are the Heroes? 

I was reading an advertising book of a prominent advertiser and business owner of his time and he stated several times throughout the book that when you are hiring a good man look for these specific qualities he then goes on to list. It makes me think.

Other than the ol’ ‘my granny, my mother, or wonder woman’ response I never really answered this in a business success kind of way. As it turns out, 98.9% of all my books are written by men – I have one which I recently reviewed that was co-authored by a woman, Esther Hicks and the audiobook “Grit” by Angela Duckworth which is currently on rotation.

Everyone in business from Elon to Donald Trump, to Oprah to Michael Jordan …to whoever carved and followed their own template to success.

It’s reality – step up your game.

I don’t want this post to come off as if I agree with being a victim because I do not. That’s probably one of the things I dislike most. I do want this post to show you (if you are a woman) that it’s okay to carve out your own template for success and it’s okay to see how others have done it before you.

Many people feel that they always have to compete because these people believe in lack and have scarcity mindsets. That’s fine. That’s why you have to work to your potential not the potential or target of someone else.

  1. Weekly, set targets for yourself. You know what it average for you .. you know what is above average and you know what is absolutely killing it.
  2. Speak in your own voice. I’ve been guilty of this as well and gradually got myself out of speaking someone else’s language. Don’t ever be fooled or coerced into fitting in for the sake of gaining likes and friends. It’s false and fake.
  3.  There’s no need to try to overshadow or overpower anyone – Just do you, continue doing you and remain consistent. People, women, men and animals value consistency but you have to value your own worth.

If you’re a women, the worst thing ever is competing with another woman entrepreneur – that’s just low. Or trying to keep up with the Joneses. it’s stupid and is a waste of TERM.

Some time ago I watched a female entrepreneur present at a seminar and it was one of the worst things I’ve ever had to witness in my life. It was completely bad. Not only that, she returned nothing of value to the audience as payment for giving our undivided attention and money to be there.

To this day I still do not get what she was trying to say.

The punch line was:” Look at me and my kids. Aren’t we nice? Want to know what I do? Umm nope, not telling” then the crowd cheered this lady on as if she was the lone precursor to their dreams come true.  That’s when I realized that this template everyone was tracing …is skewed. And everyone, is a follower.

People are followers and they don’t even know how to unplug from the template – cause if they did, honesty and reality would prevail. Lady, you are not good, sit down.

I see all of this: template after template and noone daring to sidestep, or challenge it – until now.

Until I came along and got loud and said books can be one page words: ACTION. Take ACTION. Until my company The Comfort Killers LLC is on its way to being a solid foundation for personal growth tools and self-improvement.

Even my book isn’t the same.

I played the game for awhile in the beginning cause I didn’t know any better and I supported and purchased a lot of material from people – but the same ones have not returned the support back to me. You know why? Because I stepped away from the template. I knew it was coming, especially when I set it up this way.

If you are reading this: KEEP GOING.

The more you continue to go and keep pressing on doing it the right way – Keep attracting real people in your life. People that understand the flow of value and relationship. People that respect uniqueness and improvement – Push on, doing what is necessary.

<heart, heart, awesome!, HBD, thumbs up>

Remain uncomfortable,

Stacy A. Cross

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